Where It Began

 

At five years old, this little girl with sparkly glasses from the small town of Warren, New Jersey, was about to embark on the trip of a lifetime.

She would travel with her family across the Atlantic on board the original Queen Mary ocean liner (where, among many other adventures, she’d befriend a waiter named Tony, who would sneak her extra boxes of Sugar Pops, her then favorite cereal), landing on the shores of Southampton, England. From there the six-some would travel by train to Karlsruhe, Germany. (Of note, one brother was inadvertently delivered elsewhere, after strolling onto a car of the train that broke off and headed to France. Fortunately, despite initial panic, he was found and the family remained in tact!)

Once settled into a little house on a street called Gretelweg, she would walk a cobblestoned path to the bus that brought her to kindergarten, where she mostly remembers drawing a lot. She would also play with the neighborhood children, develop a fondness for Toblerone chocolate, visit castles and lap up their lore, travel on winding alpine roads, gape at tulip fields, and collect a doll from each of the umpteen countries they’d visit before arriving home a year later, by then fluent in German.

It was an impressionable age and may very well, as her father suggested, have unwittingly sparked her love for seeing other parts of the world.

While it wasn’t a long stay, Austria had been one of the family’s travel stops. Twenty something years later, she would again visit Germany (and their old house on Gretelweg, which looked even smaller then!) and would again see Austria, noting the similarly striking beauty of both countries. And now, about 60 years later, she’s off once more to Austria – this time to lead an art retreat in the Alps.

Life works in mysterious ways, doesn’t it? I kind of like that. It’s not exactly where it started, but close enough. And part of me will bring the spirit of “little me” along on this next adventure, where I’ll also, no doubt, be drawing a lot and playing with friends.

Side note: I wrote this pre–Austria trip, and have since come and gone (it was glorious), but am just now getting caught up here on my blog. Retreat details coming next!

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After the Leap

 

I’m a bit giddy about my new series of abstract paintings, so why am I choosing to share this pen and ink drawing from my early days? Blame it on Mercury Retrograde? Or the sense that my own sails are raised and ready for new adventure?

A symbolic piece then, of voyage; of casting off and setting sail; a metaphorical departure from the safety of one shore to the wilds of an unknown other – in this case, a marked departure from an innate, well-practiced tendency towards detail to a deeper, and ultimately freer, realm of instinctive expression. It’s exciting to look ahead, but the occasional revisit to where you’ve come from can also be worthwhile – like puzzle pieces of how you got from A to B to P to Z.

Here I can feel my younger self dipping her calligraphy pen in and out of the ink jar to get just the right amount of liquid on the nib (delighting in each stroke that didn’t bleed or drip!), her steady hand and sharp eyes playing with light and shadow to create a recognizable two-dimensional thing, the pleasure of her then new-found discovery of knowing when to stop. I was in college for this piece, and someone (a professor?) had the brilliant idea of turning it into a metal engraving – I’m guessing to make prints of some sort, which I don’t recall happening  – but I still have the engraving, which somehow feels like a work of art in its own right.

 

 

In this moment though, perhaps this pen & ink sailboat jumped out because the past two years have seen quite a lot of casting off and setting sail. I took a leap – from the sea, from green mountains and lush gardens and quaint, old-moneyed towns, to clever cactus and red rocks that reach into your soul and great big breathable skies with extra shiny stars. A leap from knowing lots of people nearby to knowing no one. From a home of 20 years, to 3 homes within one year. There’s been the shedding of tired emotions. Letting go of old stories. Creating new stories with new faces and new hearts. Making new paintings, writing new poems. The waters have been choppy – other times smoother than silk (even marvelous dare I say) – and I have not one regret.

Now as I sit poised for another step in this high-desert adventure, I thank my younger self for her artistic diligence; I thank my illustrator self for her imagination and storytelling, and the landscape and pear-painting me for her care – just as I welcome my current self’s desire to throw paint around willy-nilly. Because what’s created with joy will breed joy. Or so one hopes!

Here’s to everyone’s adventure, whatever form it takes. It can look like moving across the country with dreams yelling in your pocket, but it might not. Adventures start inside, and may just take you around the corner, but if you hear the call – whatever calls to you – I think you ought to listen hard.

 

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She took a leap of faith and grew her wings on the way down. – David Brinkley

Don’t refuse to go on an occasional wild goose chase — that’s what wild geese are for. – Author Unknown

You’ll always miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. – Wayne Gretzky

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Dragons in Sedona (and other magical things)

The adventure is in full swing – it’s been at least a few months since I’ve posted here; my more regular sharing preempted by selling our sweet New Jersey home and moving across the country with our two cats and a few suitcases in tow – and by all accounts, so far so good!

Surrounded by magnificent rocks that shine bright orange-gold to fire-engine red as the sun goes down, stars so close you can pluck them out of the night sky, where javelina roam and bobcats prowl and hawks and ravens fly in circles in big, blue expanses over red earth rich with evergreens and cactus and magic…. all this I get to enjoy while finding my way to settling in (with a proper studio and a much anticipated reunion with my own things currently in storage back east).

And while I wait, what better way than my books to make a little mark in my new town – a place where dragons surely breathe amidst those rust-colored mountains piercing the sky, and fairies flit between rocks and splash their wings in the creek (and where, perhaps, mermaids only wish to be!).

Fortunately for me, the wonderful folks at the highly respected Sedona Arts Center thought it was a good idea, too, so next weekend (December 15th and 16th) I’ll be in their gallery between 6 and 8pm, pen in hand, meeting more good people and signing books.

Oh, the magic.

If you’re anywhere near Sedona, Arizona next weekend, I’d love to see you. If not, but like the idea of giving the gift of reading and imagination to the young (and young at heart!), all my books (and mermaid dress-up game) are available on Amazon.

Stay tuned for more notes to come. More art. More writings. More of what happens when you surrender to your callings. Most importantly, enjoy your holiday season, be safe and love well, because that’s the best magic of all.

 

…………………..      ♦      …………………….

 

…………………..      ♦      …………………….

 

 

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Hello Adventure

“As you go the way of life, you will see a great chasm. Jump. It is not as wide as you think.”*

 

Not the jump-out-of-an-airplane kind of adventure. Not diving with sharks, and most definitely not (ever) climbing anything resembling Mt. Everest.

No, this is an adventure of heeding the voice that shouts “go that way!” when staring at one of life’s crossroads.

Sometimes we listen to that inner voice. Sometimes we don’t. Sometimes it takes a while for the message to get through.

Well, I’ve been listening. For quite a long time now. And despite its ever-growing volume, I, naturally (as any rational person might), had plenty of perfectly tidy reasons for resisting what I’ll call the calling of my soul. Things like: It’s not practical, not sensible, it might be lonely or I might fail. And those things may be true. But no degree of stewing or planning, and certainly no length of talking about it, lessened the feeling that I was being led somewhere else, and that a leap of faith was required. Reasonable or not, resistance was futile. It was time to answer the call. To say “yes”. Period.

And with that realization – that acceptance –  my anxiety and indecision fell away. Poof!  The “where” became clear; I would go back to the southwest. It’ll be my Sedona: Part II. Confirmations appeared. Synchronicities. Opportunities. Details began to align. Amazing.

So. I’ll soon be trading tree-lined suburban streets for red rocks and cactus. Shingles for adobe. Manhattan’s high-rises for big wide skies. With my sensible list out-maneuvered by a relentless push for greater creative expression, I’m full-tilt trusting my gut and hoping the universe has my back.

Of course, yes, there’s a stack of bittersweet that comes with it. I’ll miss being close to the sea. I’ll miss my Japanese maple and tending my sweet English garden out front. The swings hanging from a big old oak tree. Copious amounts of tea and conversation shared with friends. Hot fudge ever present on the stove. (Wait. Actually, that probably won’t change.) Walls that expanded and rooms that comforted. This is the home where I raised my daughter, my heart filled to overflowing. Twenty of the more than thirty years of my graphic design business happened while here. Books were born into the world. Paintings were made. Heartaches healed. Joys. Tears. Laughter. Magic. If a house could love, this one did. Some of my best years lived here, so there’s been some “good-bye” that’s had to happen.

But I’m reminded that nothing is permanent. I’m reminded that a spirit denied becomes cranky and impatient. I’m reminded that we must, indeed, be true to ourselves.

And as I leap across Joseph Campbell’s proverbial chasm – it could be my imagination, but – it seems the universe is dancing. A new chapter begins; adventures await.

*  Advice given to a young Native American, noted in Joseph Campbell’s “Power of Myth”.

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"Scary Illustrations" and Other Great Reviews

Everyone likes a great review. When you’re published by a small independent publisher, you appreciate them even more. And so, I send my heartfelt thanks to all who’ve written reviews for my books over at Amazon.

I love the 5-starred ones best (of course!), but they say “no review is a bad review”, so I appreciate them all – even the one about the fairy book illustrations being scary. (That had to be my favorite “negative” review. Because, really?)

And as I’m soon to launch a new book, I’ve got books on the brain. (Well, sure, I often have books on the brain, between writing them, reading them, and designing covers for others – but today, even more so.) So I wanted to send out a nudge to anyone who’s a fan of any of my 3 current books or my mermaid toy, encouraging you to head over to Amazon and write something sweet.

It really makes a difference, and helps get more books into more hands, especially those young ones whose imaginations are so alive. Thank you dearly!

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Going Thoreau

Pond. Woods. Cabin. Pen. Paper. Laptop. Me, and piles of unfinished writings. (Right. Thoreau didn’t have a laptop, much less electricity. So let’s call it a modern-day female Thoreau of sorts.) Wind whipping through red-budded trees, ducks squawking, late afternoon sun bouncing off royal blue water, star-studded nights and a deer (or three or four) to greet you at your door. Some fresh space for the muses.

Of course I wasn’t really alone. Aside from the ducks and deer (and, apparently, bears), there were plenty of other characters for company – a couple of boys and girls, some angels, and monsters, a flying horse here and there. There were real-live actual people too, nearby but not too near, and no one making a ruckus. No cars zipping by, no leaf-blowers or tv’s blaring. Laundry could wait, dishes were few, regular life paused. Except I did miss our cats sitting on my work. (I think?)

So, that was my five-day gift to myself – a mini back-to-nature answer to the incessant chatter of works undone while I’m otherwise busy designing things like branding and book covers for my wonderful clients. A cabin in the woods. A room with a view. Pen and paper. It was both enough and not enough. Is there ever enough time, though?

We do what we can when we can with what we have – then grab on and go.

mug

writings.bags.buttercream

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roadX

treeshadows

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On Being Irish, Lucky and Green

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It’s upon us yet again – the day of dance and drink, and feasting on Irish bacon and cabbage, all to honor St. Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland.

Of course, I’m always a little conflicted about whether I should be celebrating St. Patrick’s Day. I’m not fully Irish, you see, but I love potatoes, ballads and Liam Neeson’s accent, so maybe some of that counts a little.

I’m not all that lucky either, at least when it comes to things like winning at lotteries or blackjack ~  except for the time my sister and I, restless after being cooped up in a very, very long car ride, went looking for four-leaf clovers on a remote North Carolina mountainside (because what else do you do when you find yourself in a field of clover?). To our surprise, we both found one. Then we found more. And more! And then we started finding 5-leaf clovers, and even some 6-leafers! This was magical, I’m telling you straight out. I’ve not seen a single four-leaf clover before or since (much less the five or sixers). So maybe this just means there’s always a bit of luck along the way if we take time to notice.

As for being green, well sure, it’s a great color that comes in a slew of shades, but I can’t say I’m fond of green beer. I do love green vegetables, though, so maybe that counts. My eyes are sometimes green. And I’m sure that some Leprechauns are green, but not all of them. And this is all quite confusing, so maybe we should just leave the whole being green bit to Kermit.

Then of course, there’s the name. Are we sure, really sure, it’s all about St. Patrick? … or might there’ve been a wee slip of the pen when writing St. Patricia. Hmmmm. :  )

Speaking of… Saint Pat was actually born in Roman Britain (way back in the fifth century), but apparently was kidnapped at 16 and brought to Ireland to work as a slave. (I did not know this!)  He escaped (phew!), but returned to Ireland in later years, bringing Christianity with him, appealing to both the Roman Catholics and the Irish Protestants of the land. (No small feat in Ireland… so I’m guessing he must have been charming, as well as devout.) In the process, he also elevated the status of the shamrock, by using its three leaves to explain the Holy Trinity (Father, Son and Holy Spirit).

After nearly thirty years of evangelism, he died on March 17, in the year 461. Patrick has endured as the principal champion of Irish Christianity.

And with all that said, it’s back to work ~ perhaps wearing a spot of green, feeling lucky, and dining on spuds with a whisper of an Irish blessing in my ear … whether any of it counts or not.

…………..

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
and rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

…………..saxton.potato.guiness.

 

saxton_week29.52weeksofpeace

 

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Patience and Process

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Everything’s got a process. The seasons, falling in love, solving a problem, making a meal, setting sail, etc.

So, too, with art.

With design, it’s largely a mental process. One word, one image, one “sense” can set off a cascade of ideas for the mind to siphon and distill, then execute with the clean tools of my Mac. (Not like the old days of things like rubber cement, and amber sheets for separating color, which I readily admit not missing at all.)

With illustration, it’s both a mental and physical process – lining up my tools, making physical sketches, conjuring ways to illustratively express different concepts and then execute, still, for me, primarily by hand.

With painting, it’s almost purely a physical process – brushes, paints, canvasses – along with a great deal of heart. There’s not a whole lot of “figuring” things out. The act of painting takes the lead, as opposed to the mind taking the lead.

And then, sometimes, the process – any process – gets clogged. There’s a setback. Things happen – often things that are out of our control (although, most of life is [out of our control], despite what we might like to think… but that’s another talk, for another time.); acts of God and so forth.

A few years back there was a huge flood in my studio. Took a few months to get my design and drawing stations in workable shape, which was key. Next would come the painting area. But time went by, and went by. The task was daunting, and I was busy writing and illustrating Dragons* in between client work.

Still, the canvasses whispered. Then they called. Then they shouted.

Finally, with some help, I cleared the space enough to feel I could answer their longing, incessant chatter, and right away felt better. Chomping at the bit, I would designate Saturday’s as painting day (other days were welcome, but this would be an agreed-to arrangement between me and paint). Yes! All was lining up.

So. On the appointed day, I clear off some last things from the table beside easel #1, clean it like new (a little lemon oil does wonders), grab a favorite old oversized shirt, a paint rag and one of the many not-so-patiently waiting images already engraved in my mind’s eye.

Just a few more things moved aside uncovers my marvelous palette, which I see, to my imminent dismay, is loaded high with caked on paint remnants. I decide it’s a work of art in and of itself – but will not do for squeezing fresh paints over all its hills and dales, nor sweeping a brush through assorted nooks and crannies.

And thus ended my first day of renewed painting. The mood cut short by a crusty old palette, and the need for a new one.

Initially frustrated, I soon realize it’s just part of the process. Making ready, preparing the space. There’s a ritual to it – shirt or apron, rags, the gathering and oozing of colors, the first strokes of the brush – and I hadn’t yet gotten to the place I’d been before, where ritual flows, all “set and ready” for when the spirit moves and chunks of time move with it.

Patience child, you’re almost there. Trust the process.

In the meantime, even more inspiration was uncovered by my delightfully messy palette (especially the underside – who knew?!) – just in case I needed any more. 😉

saxton palette / topside

saxton palette / topside

saxton palette / underside

saxton palette / underside

 

* Side note: “Book of Dragons” is officially almost here. I have my advance copy in hand! The rest will arrive …. soon, and you’ll be among the first to know.
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A Plethora of P's: (the final eight)

proactively punctuating life with the plausible, powerful possibilities of positive thought presented through a plethora of “P’s”.

– ♥ –

Wa-la! Here are the final eight of one hundred P’s in my “Plethora of P’s” series. But how did it come to be, and why the letter P, you might ask? With the original intention of creating an alphabet, I soon found my mind overflowing with “P” words – most of which were falling in line with my beliefs in Positive Thinking – add to that my own name beginning with a P – and well, one thing led to another and yet another series was born. I suppose it was “inspired”, as most of them are – from where I’m not exactly sure, but if it’s fun, positive, and allows me creative freedom, I go with it.

I do hope you’ve enjoyed them. 🙂

 

#93: PotteryP_pottery

Pottery has the admirably dual qualities of beauty and functionality. Designed at the discretion of the maker, each piece is essentially a vessel of creativity – figuratively, through artistic expression and simultaneous usefulness in a variety of practical ways – and symbolically, representing the womb; the carrying, giving and nurturing of life. 

– ♥ –

#94: Planets

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If one wants to be awed, all one needs to do is look up at the night sky. What’s there is unfathomable – billions (upon billions?) of stars; planets within universes within galaxies within more galaxies. Distances the mind can not comprehend. Possibilities of life – similar or very, very different –  in far, far, far away places.  Star Trekkian ships and Star Wars-like creatures are only fantasies, but … are they? Beyond our sky, beyond the stars and beyond the planets lies the truly Great Unknown, and amazement on an enormous scale.

– ♥ –

#95: Parachute

P_parachute

Here’s to safe landings!

– ♥ –

#96: Prolific

P_prolific

Abundantly fruitful. Profusely productive. Being prolific can as easily be a vineyard, a garden or a tree, as a poet, an artist, mathematician or scientist. There are no bounds, just rich creation.

– ♥ –

#97: Paperclip

P_paperclip

Perhaps the most talked about invention ever, and one that needs no explanation. (But, who DID invent the paperclip?)

– ♥ –

#98: Poppy

P_poppy

Ah, the alluring poppy. Its brilliant bursts of color and tales of mysterious concoctions make the poppy, all in all, a happy flower to behold.

– ♥ –

#99: Perspicacity

P_perspicacity

noun
1. keenness of mental perception; vision, insight, acumen. 
Keep your mind sharp and kickin’. Bend and stretch those mental muscles! Read. Do crossword puzzles and number games. Play scrabble. Study things. Ask questions. Listen, a lot. Stay curious. Always, stay curious.

– ♥ –

#100: Puppies

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Because just the thought of puppies makes most people smile. 🙂

……………………

(See all 100 Plethora of P’s here)

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Tea, Guacamole and A Blanket

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Intention: Early morning Sun Salutations. Long walks along the shore; the wide, cream-colored beach hedged by flowering dunes and solid, old homes with weathered shingles and thick white pillars holding up wrap-around porches. Bike rides and ice cream and warm sea breezes fueling inspirations that spread themselves like butter, page after page, in my notebooks. Skin, tingling and alive from the surf and the sun. Hair in happy, salty tangles. Laughter as the sun makes long shadows in the sand and friends share a toast to the tides; to each other; to the red glow on our shoulders (pass the aloe, please). Meditations under the moon; breaths keeping time with the rumbling, tumbling, humbling waves.

Reality: Early morning drizzle followed by chilly, windy torrents. Cold; did I mention, cold? My giant-sized, fluffy red blanket and I step, daily, onto the thick-pillar-adorned porch to admire the angry sea’s spectacular beauty; this week she’s a pounding, twisting, frothy tempest. My blanket-bundled self takes 20 yard walks to the bench at the top of the beach, finds a dry-ish spot to watch the sky for signs of sunshine. Friends arrive, singing “the sun’ll come out, tomorrow…”. My girls, generally hunkered down with their laptops and phones, are otherwise perfecting their omelette and smoothie-making skills. We eat exorbitant amounts of whole-wheat tortilla chips with guacamole dip. We find that Scotty’s fresh flounder tastes just as good in stormy weather as it does in good weather. Thank goodness I remembered to pack the Scrabble board and card decks. And my red blanket.

But still, it’s not enough to see the sea, I need to stand close, near the edge (but not so near to risk dipping my blanket in the surf) ~ so we venture time and again onto the wide, cream-colored coastline and marvel at the ocean’s extraordinary magnificence. My blanket and I enjoy tea under the eaves by the flowering dunes. We read. We take pictures and post them on Instagram. During a break in the unforgiving wind and rain we settle into a comfy spot on the soft sand and attempt to write in my notebook.

Drip.

Drop.

“Oh cruel fate . . . why do you mock me?”

Surrender.

So it’s short walks, no bikes. Ice cream, no warm breezes. Writing inside, not out. Skip the aloe. And despite the lack of shadows for five straight days, we do laugh; and we share toasts to the tides, and, mostly, to each other.

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saxton_flowering.dunes.foggy

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“Serenely full, the epicure would say, Fate cannot harm me; I have dined to-day.”
– Sydney Smith (1771 – 1845)

 

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