After the Leap

I’m a bit giddy about my new series of abstract paintings, so why am I choosing to share this pen and ink drawing from my early days? Blame it on Mercury Retrograde? Or the sense that my own sails are raised and ready for new adventure?

A symbolic piece then, of voyage; of casting off and setting sail; a metaphorical departure from the safety of one shore to the wilds of an unknown other – in this case, a marked departure from an innate, well-practiced tendency towards detail to a deeper, and ultimately freer, realm of instinctive expression. It’s exciting to look ahead, but the occasional revisit to where you’ve come from can also be worthwhile – like puzzle pieces of how you got from A to B to P to Z.

Here I can feel my younger self dipping her calligraphy pen in and out of the ink jar to get just the right amount of liquid on the nib (delighting in each stroke that didn’t bleed or drip!), her steady hand and sharp eyes playing with light and shadow to create a recognizable two-dimensional thing, the pleasure of her then new-found discovery of knowing when to stop. I was in college for this piece, and someone (a professor?) had the brilliant idea of turning it into a metal engraving – I’m guessing to make prints of some sort, which I don’t recall happening  – but I still have the engraving, which somehow feels like a work of art in its own right.

In this moment though, perhaps this pen & ink sailboat jumped out because the past two years have seen quite a lot of casting off and setting sail. I took a leap – from the sea, from green mountains and lush gardens and quaint, old-moneyed towns, to clever cactus and red rocks that reach into your soul and great big breathable skies with extra shiny stars. A leap from knowing lots of people nearby to knowing no one. From a home of 20 years, to 3 homes within one year. There’s been the shedding of tired emotions. Letting go of old stories. Creating new stories with new faces and new hearts. Making new paintings, writing new poems. The waters have been choppy – other times smoother than silk (even marvelous dare I say) – and I have not one regret.

Now as I sit poised for another step in this high-desert adventure, I thank my younger self for her artistic diligence; I thank my illustrator self for her imagination and storytelling, and the landscape and pear-painting me for her care – just as I welcome my current self’s desire to throw paint around willy-nilly. Because what’s created with joy will breed joy. Or so one hopes!

Here’s to everyone’s adventure, whatever form it takes. It can look like moving across the country with dreams yelling in your pocket, but it might not. Adventures start inside, and may just take you around the corner, but if you hear the call – whatever calls to you – I think you ought to listen hard.

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She took a leap of faith and grew her wings on the way down. – David Brinkley

Don’t refuse to go on an occasional wild goose chase — that’s what wild geese are for. – Author Unknown

You’ll always miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. – Wayne Gretzky

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